I speak ghandi

Many times I sit alone and it will be the only time where I feel I’m been my self and I’m happy and relived, every night I celebrate alone on my bed sitting looking at the wall feeling oh this is the time where I feel so happy where I’m alone and no one is there but during the day I’m surrounded by the whole world. there isn’t a day where I spend it alone without having someone coming to say approaching me for a thing and people love to come to me just for a chat and I like that too but during that whole fuss I feel something is missing I feel alone...
I feel that I don’t celebrate my self enough like when I do when I’m alone and then suddenly everything makes sense. They always say that you need people to live and I cannot agree more but would it make you happy when you’re surrounded by people. Every Thursday I crave for the night to reach so I can go to bed and spend my night reading or watching a movie. It’s the time where I feel everything is connected to me and that life really means something more then just people and working and outings. Life means much more, there's a spiritual side that reached to me every Thursday night and I reach the ultimate balance between pleasure and religion. Something that I sensed many times when I knew love...
Love is the balance between the two basic things about this world, life and prayers. True love for everything, I fell in love with a book, I fell in love with a faze, I fell in love with my new gold fish. Sometimes loving stuff around us makes more sense then loving a person who might harm you eventually or even demolish this love you have. Pure love is always a balance; it’s always the middle option the compromise.
I feel sorry for people who didn’t discover such a reality during their life because life is not just about life is two sides where you reach to a balance that will make your life makes sense out of a sudden :)
Some of my scrabble makes no sense till the day a person finds that balance.

In that sky

Seconds, minutes, days and then years and life is running. Now when i look back it feels like decades since yesterday. and i still look at the same sky every day. The moon is still the same, the breeze is still the same, that old tree is still the same. But me! why do i still feel different while I'm still here in the same place. Same people, same sky, same sea, same tree and everything is the same but only time is different. Why do i feel that i need to be there. Somewhere else but not here. Its been a long time and I'm waiting and its been a long time I'm wondering why am I still here. I know that I'm not here, i know that i need and i must be somewhere else. Where is that place? why can't I find that place? i know the place but I don't have the courage to go there. That sky is waiting for me everyday and i know that I'm craving to see it too. Life, People, Family, Culture, Religion and everything is holding me right here and I'm not happy. I belong in that sky, and that sky is home.

Lost

A crowded place full of people. People we know and people we might never know and meet and then know. We might know a lot of people a lot of different personalities. We might be loved by all these people and be considered as best friend. Attending a party or a gathering and you mingle with everyone laughing out loud been a total different person from who you really are. Hiding someone behind this confident “I know what I’m doing” mask. But no one can recognize who we really are. Only I can know who I really am. Cracking jokes having everything in this life, a successful life, a great house, a beautiful face and a great spirit but still something is missing. We still depart to bed at night thinking was it really me? Is this who I am? And the bigger question, am I happy? Who can identify me among all faces? Who can know who I am just like I do? Why do we still feel lonely all though we have the world in our hands? Is everything not enough? Is enough is never enough to us? Is the sea is still not enough for our tears? Where and when we shall feel home? Where is home? Why do we still wonder till today?

Time

Tick Tuck,

Time is a mystery. Many ppl think that time is just time but I believe that time is one of the powerful things in this world. How do we think? We think a head!!! Doesn’t make sense I know! But what if we think backwards??? What will happen then?? Many things will change. Many decision made, facts, elements, activities and life as a whole will change. If we knew or even predicted every possible incident that could happen to us we would be living today in a flawless world. Where everything seems to be organized and everything is right. UN fortunately we do! We’re doers and that can be a good thing at a time but we need to spend more time on thinking. We need to see the outcome and from there take our mind to a backward journey experiencing how and why I reached where I reached today.
Sadly it happens all over again. We do and do and do and never think and then we still suffer. We could easily solve a problem without even having a problem but then ppl might say why I should spend my time worrying about something that might never happen and we shall learn from our mistakes, I say true and I can never argue on this cuz I believe it true too. But do we really learn from our mistakes?
Do we really think backwards when the problem happen again? Do we know the system of our lives? I say NO! We don't and we will never do, because we need to stop for a moment and think. Things can't be driven back to you every time and you still blame the world for your problems. You create your own destiny and only you can make it better...
Time can play a huge role in our lives.
Time can be precious now but we never know it till it’s too late. Precious this time now. And think of time now. Before it’s too late and no time is left for things to go back where it should be. I believe that time is somewhere looking at us tick tucking with life's heart beats until one day it will stop and life will end with it. Then what? They say it’s never too late. But time is sad somewhere waiting for us once and for all to think about him and how time can only help us about each tiny thing about our lives. Start preciousing your time before its too late...

I will hurt you now

a decision is been made.
i locked this key forever.
as much as you might hate me for making this decision
but i love you that much to hurt you now for you to be happy forever.
i know it doesn't make sense. but one day it will.
i will hurt you now to let you live to let you love for latter.
i will hurt you now to give you the ultimate infinity.
i signed a death note
my name was next to the death signature option.
i will hurt you now because i know i will save you
i will kill you now because my love is forever
not for today, not for tomorrow its forever
i 've decided
you will live to continue living
you will feel pain to continue happiness
you will feel bitter to continue relief
i will hurt you now to hold you away forever
i will hurt you now just for a moment
to have forever without "hurt"
to love till never, to live till ever
i will hurt you now and i will fade away
i lift you up in that rock
and i saw you from the bottom of the sea
having a smile up my face
a happy overwhelmed feeling
you live and i will die
am sorry
i will never hurt you
but i will hurt you now.

The Dark Knight

3 years ago i went to the same theatre plaza to watch a movie called batman begins. I've expected a lame cheap copy cat movie about batman's classics. yet this movie 3 years ago has left a deep impact on me. i weird connection. some might think its stupid. yet i believe that if batman existed i would do anything just to see him and tell him thank you. Cuz because of you i am a stronger person today. i had a situation back then and the movie made me decide how to get over that situation and it helped me a lot for the past 3 years. ironically the same situation happened to me in this stage of my life and again batman "the dark knight" had this power to take me out of that situation by guiding me on what should i do next. it may seem stupid but batman has and will always be my favorite superhero. he doesn't have spidy powers like spider man or has great power from another planet like krypton or whatever it is. he has a power to believe in good. and by using his mind he reached where he is today. he's like another robin hood but more modern and developed.

the movie was smashing, magnificent. i would love to go and see it again.

the soundtrack, the scene effects everything was just breath taken. 100/10 that's how i rate this movie. not to mention the great christian bale whom i must say deserve an Oscar for this role. and the amazing heath ledger as the joker had played a genius role. yet i feel so awful that he past away recently for an over drugged dose.

best movie for 2008.

a bumb in the head

everything seem to be so cold, freezing me to death at this moment. yet its so hot outside "the weather" everything seems to burn. but am still cold, shaking, shivering! no i'm not sick! i thought that too at first but its not a physical problem. Its more then that! the funny feeling where everything feels fuzzy and buzzing around me is getting stronger by the minute. everything seems to be slow! am i dreaming or what??
i wanna go out in the sun to feel warm, but someone told me no use! stay where you are and slap your self. i touch my cheeks "its burning" but why am i cold!
i walked around searching for answeres but even the answeres i get are so cold! i need something warm. i need to feel heat again. i need to be alive. you've got fever! someone yelled from far away as i can hear'em but apparently he's just infornt of me!! i said no its impossible! What a day!! a blink of an eye where water was just flushing in my hair, body. very cold i must say! i just relised that i bumbed my head and fell in the shower!

hurt

Long time i haven't wrote anything in here, but its about time i reveal things that i couldn't share with anyone but my blog...
Sometimes it takes us ages to relise that all our life is a lie, that for years i've living a dream and i just woke up... what upsets me more is that someone woke me up, i didn't wake up my own. things, facts, elements were waving from far far away telling me to wake up but i continued sleeping and i had the feeling where between each breath that moment of no air are the times i raised on top of happiness. but now i breath air, am very much feeling each breath i take with each air enters my blood cycle. but the fact i feel am dead is something i can't understnad. its a moment where i died and i'm lost and can't find that light. where i shall go to rest till my time comes. where is that light? everything seems so un real in reality. i see things i never saw or didn't want to see. hurt is how i feel.

Truth: The truth about truth

Since we were kids we were raised not to lie! We were told that lying will cause problems and lying has a short rope that will reveal in the end and thats totally true! but what about the truth.. Truth can harm and hurt more then lying in my opeinion. Truth can cause more damage then a lie. the truth about truth that truth is not always the right decesion we choose.

Its been a while

Wow its been a while since i posted anything over here and i kinda miss this place :)
well well whats new in my life, nothing seriously interesting other then having a normal calm life. work has a big part of my daily activities and mostly enjoying the rest of the day away from something called work! its like having two personalities, so active at work moving talking doing and than calm funny lazy social. This life can be really irritating at the same time its joyable somehow. Part of me is seeking for a change but the other part is scared of changes. its weird that i know how conflected i am though i still conflect my self in things! I wonder if its a weekness.
Any how welcome back my blog :)

April fool

Well i've celebrated april fool my own way and its earlier two days as well lol, i just lied to my boss to go watch the movie 300 lol, its a beautiful day worthed for such a lie, so yeah within couple of minutes i'm out of here to my world of insanity and hey quote of they day i heard was wow it described me! it says; i want to be by my self but i dont want to be alone!
great day :P

Well i saw Bob Green for the first in the Opra show and damn that guy is amazing with his diet health plans, many women had strugeled thier whole life with this issue and with his spisrital organized way he managed to create some really good result with hopeless cases... And the way he approaches his believes is so inspiring to many over weighted people who has been abbanded from the socity life because of such thing. Well i went through his website and i checked his books, its amazing how it is truelly the best life he's talking about that we all need. So healthy and organised, if you can take control of your weight than definitly you can take control of everything!

Many people can be slim but trust me they dont have a single clue what is a healthy life! but been in the right track in your weight can always provide you with a healthy decent life full of peaceful moment!!! Find the control in your weight and you'll control your whole life ;) love ya bob green

My new baby

This is my new baby now days got it as well as a gift... i fell in love with it since first days and al thought it doesn't have that high technology everone is seeking for but i just love the simple phone and shape of my new baby...

God live moto ;)

Rod Stewart and his big hits..

Well i had a long long day at worn and the only thing that make my day go so smooth was Rod Stewart and his song what a wonderful world, it just relaxed me and made me be peaceful somehow and a lil sad for many many reasons lol i rather not discuss them in a puplic BLOG lol!
Oh Rod Stewart you made my day and yeah i think its a wonderful world full of surprises ;)

Long time

Wow its been ages since i wrote in my certain spot, i miss this place where i can revieal everything directory to my fans LOL just kidding, well i miss my special corner here... And guess who's back... ME! ;)

before the birds wake up

this new stupid shift starts so early that i cant even open my eyes! LIKE the whole uneverse is still a sleep even the birds are still in their nests, and am awake crowlling to my car to get here to this stupid chair in this stupid place to this stupid calls! grrrrr i mean WHO calls at 6 AM in the morning! GOD HELP ME i need a sleep!

:S

My new phone

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW finally i got a new phone LOL, well i never bought any phone in my life and actually am not a big fan of the new technology, i rather anything simple so i can text and call and yeah i like new things but i rather cute things! Well actually i didnt buy this phone and i got it as a gift LOL! am that pathetic hehehe, i feel so lazy to buy any new phone! But hey i have this one now and i'm sooooooooo in love with it!

I have limited dreams lol :P

To an angel..

"Maybe one day"


tickeles in my stomach
a funny feeling in my throught
a cold shy "its ok" smile in my face
a flipping look to you and to the whole world around me
a shaking lip that i felt so far away in my own world
my book fell down
the only thing i heard and it was so shocking
the book's sound in the ground
everyone looked at me
and i was just looking at you
what i didnt expected and never in a million year dreamt off
is that you'd look back
you looked backyou came
i was breathless
i lost all sense in everything
i died pysically but i just started a life in my soul
your eyes in my eyes, your breath in the air
i can feel everything move from down to top in my face
i can feel the blood vense dancing from fear and happiness
i can feel my eyes wondering is it a dream or is it real'
he's moving to my site
he's coming to a path that i dreamt of my entir life
he's coming to change my world
with his hand he touched my book
miss miss!!!
a music in my ear played with these two words
an amazing tone came from his voice
i blinked...... finally!
i saw our life in one blink
me and him playing, dancing , swimming and laughing
his laughter in my ears is a memory worthed this moment
i giggled and i came back to him and to his eyes
your book
and a touch from his angelatic skin
burned my finger and i hold my breath hoping for something to float
that was it
i smiled... i'd never forget that moment between us
i barried that moment in a grave that only i know about
i faced life with a happy smile since than
that look was enough for me to be happy till the day i meet him again
maybe not now but maybe one day..

Eid Mubarak my blog...

Eid Mubarak to my dear Blog and to all the islamic nation specially my dear Oman :)
And happy new year in advance to all..

كل عام وانتم بخير

some shots from this year (part i)

My brother Mans in my granmma's house during eid, it was in jan. we had lots of fun that day..

The sky was so magical that afternoon from this year

I couldnt miss taking a picture of it!

This was one day, the sky was so amazing that day, i opened my car's convertable, it was wwoow!

This was recently in the early december days, it was

raining so bad that day, it felt sad but i loved it..

Its the 3ed of DEC!

the 3ed of december is in exactly 20 minutes from this time here! Two of my best angels in this world are celebrating there birthday on this day! One will turn 25 and the other will be 21 just like me :)
i was the 8th in wishing my 25 year ols angel and the 4th in wishing my 21 year old angel! :( i was so sad cz i wanted to be the first!

Happy Birthday olo and Tuma :* may all your dreams come true and may our love last forever guys! I love you and i wish you all the best through our life :P

Have a blast guys! ;) shake the booty you have cuz you gotta wait 356 days till this day come again ;) inshallah..

My first design

Well my cousing is studying in this designing school and she came to me bescause she had lots of home works to do and she needed help! So she was told that i can drow things! All though i hate telling anyone that i do! Therefore she came to me and she begged me to drow a design for her and to use color effects and shadow in it! I was just like errrr who ever told you i can drow s/he lied! I'm not that good! am just ok! the girl was like pls pls so this is what i came up with! Thank god she loved it so much!

We have planes but God already planned for us!

I was so excited for the public holidays the goverment issued for us regarding the national day. I made lots of planes, me and my family decided to go camping and then go here and there.. it was 8 o'clock and we were suppose to go out at 10 A.M and i heard this strong knocks in my room then my mom came in and she was crying i got freaked out, i stod in my bed with my hair all bushy wondring what going on! Ma maa is everything ok, she said your grandmother passed away! I couldnt stand i felt oh my god! I was like which one of them! She was like my aunt the one who raised me after my mother died! I hold mom and gave her my condolenses am really sorry mama.. This is how we put a plane for our lives and god has already planed for us! I rushed to call my sister Salwa i called her and i was in shock salwa salwa our grandmother passed away! salwa bust in tears rushing to us..
about 9:30 i reached the funeral, everyone was there.. It was like eid or like a family reunin the only difference was that poeple were crying instead of smiling! Evryone was tearing up.. They took me to a room full of poeple and there she lyes! Like a sleeping beauty so peaceful and so calm. i was like its not possible maybe she fainted maybe she's a sleep maybe she's in a colma! I mean come on she's so peacefully smiling and its like in any moment will open her eyes and give me her usual smile when ever she see me. Her laughter is in my ears the way she used to call my name the way she used to eat her food and ripped it in to small pieces because she couldnt handle solid food due to her age.. Everything just clicked in my mind. The first thing i did was getting close to her and just looking at her face. A face that i would not see for real again till one day. It was time for her to be washed and to be coffined! I was in shock. The way they wshed her and dress her up like a little baby who cant move and you have to do everything for him, but this time this baby is sleeping without moving! It was time for them to take her. i looked at her covered body for the last time i came close and whispered i love you dear grandmother and i hope one day we will meet again..
after that i was thinking alot, i sat in a corner and saw how mama was so sad about her second mother.. i hate this feeling, you lose someone and it hurts so bad but all what you can do is just to accept it. i was thinking how do they feel why do they seem so quite, there under the crave how does it feel, what happeneds next, where do they go, do they wait long till the judgment day or its just a blink to them? many questions where up my head!! wondering wondering and wondering? how why and when? i exhurasted my mind from all the thoughts.. Finally i stood up from my place and said to my self one day it will be mom and one day it will be daddy and one day it will be ME! am i prepare for it? I can never be prepare for death but i have to give it more thoughts i should give it more time concendering whats after it and what might happened if i was in my grandmother's position! God planned that on the 28th of November 2006 my grandmother will die normaly while sleeping like he planned on Wednesday 18th of Augest 1999 for my brother to die in an accident. I'm waiting for my plane now and only who wrote it knows when and how.. God please have mercy on us and all the muslims during death and the judgement day Amen!

The ring (The curse)

I got a gift on my birthday from an angel.. The gift was a ring! Its been with me since that day till now so almost 2 months and i cant do a thing without it! i sleep with i eat with it i shower with it i do everything with it! I became possesed with this tiny round thing around my finger! Once i came out of the house in a hurry and funny enough i took it out for the first time cuz i was putting some hand loacian in my hands, so i went out and i FORGOT it and i reached all the way half to where i was heading maybe 5 KM away from where i was heading! I remembered it and i rolled back my car so fast just to reache to it :S
Since that day i make sure i wake up and see it in my hands and close my eyes and sleep after making sure that its where it belongs! So since then i call it the THE CURSE! cuz seriously my angel cursed me with it! But i love my ring any ways :P

Cought of the day..

Troubles and sadness may be in a person's life but you always see that person having a great bright smile in his face.. Shine in your days like you never have cuz you may never have that day again.. poeple loves to interfere in everything but the solution is always the ignorance and to keep go on.. Why to bother why to care why to feel pain, some say that i have no feelings cuz i care less or its either am not a humen beign but i always smile and say that i live to die tomorrow. be conciouse of whats going on and just be patient its just another day in your book. faith can be a powerful whepon if you use it right and it can be destroying if you over use it.. even the brightest person can fall. I never reached the bottom of anything cuz i shine most of the time just to smile and to complete my day and somone's day that i may not even know yet...
i got a tear in my eye today for the first time in public and someone can and said;
even the nearly perfect people cry but only the greatest will hold his tears and instead smile..
عظيم ذلك الانسان الذي يحبس دمعة وهو في قمة الالم ويشرق وجهه بابتسامه تعلو المه وتخفيه

Incubus- warning

Man this song is awesome! I used to love this incubus band through my freind Sam who used to tell me louds about them! i was like cool since i love rock songs! Then i fell in love with the band and thier songs specially the Drive song! And today i was just bored and felt like listening to them again and here i am again falling in love with thier cool song warning :P


P.S; the song lilnked to the title!

fix me..(dream)

dreams i have inside me, night life i have in my heart.. Having my love and our family . living in never land the whole time. feeling so happy and joyful, feeling so blessed.. All my dreams came true in my dream, all the fantasy i used to see came to real. i see everything here. my baby girl is next to me.. my love is holding me....
wake up! its all just a dream..
my reality hurts he's still with her, he's still there for her..
god please Fix me..

Just a misunderstanding..

Keep your heart free from hate, your mind from worry
Live simple, expect little, give much
Fill your life with love, scatter sunshine
Forget your self, think of others
do as you would be done by

Changes and Time

Time passes and we dont see the way things change! but after a while when we remember we feel and we miss, its really weird how we feel we're not satisfied at this moment then after a while of time or a year or two we wish if time reverse and we live what we had before because we couldnt see how valuable it was for us back then! I'm a person who really hates changes all though am really flixable about everything in my life! Changes are something good most of the time if its developping your life, but most of the time a person needs to accept it and move on! I cant do that but most of the time i have too! And i move on and re-new everything in my life.. Memories is something happy but mostly sad, Losing a person is a very sad memory and remembering how s/he was in your life is a happy memory.. What i get from all this; is that happiness cant servive without sadness..

Books

Two books am dying to read!
1- The Time Traveler's Wife..
2- Vernonica Decides To Die!

The introduction to the two books is so attracting! Will go search for them in my favorite book store here in Muscat which is the FAMILY book store! Hopefully will find them, otherwise i'll have to order them somhow :/

My car/ Stranger in Moscow

Well my car pased away last night :( the battery was low so me and my baby (my car) were saperated from each other, therefore i had to use my mum's old gulf (1998) one! Actually it was my brother's (god mercy his soul) for that mum didnt want to let go of the car! So i end up using the car and i found a Michel Jackson tape in it so i was like hell yeah i love this dude so lemme listen to it! Funny enough when i switched on the music, one of MY favorite songs of the King of pop was on; which was Starnger in Moscow. Yo i was all happy and i got some really old memories back out of it! I felt blessed! Therefore i end up listening to the song for the whole day while working here in my disk ;)

p.s for my dear blog; the song is linked to the title ;) And its video as well lol.

Oh i feel happy... :P

Light a candle of hope!

it is true, it is very difficult at first to move on easily, you will start blaming your self, where did you go wrong, why did all this happen,,,,unger & tears will drop on, cuz you think you tried your best to make it work out. How long it may take to cure depends on you, and on how long the relationship was, where you married ,have kids…. ext. Breakup happens cuz you where meant to be with that person for that period of time to learn and grow. In the future, you will meet who you are meant to complete your life with for a certain time or until your life ends never know. The strength is the ability to love as if you never loved before, to have faith it will last forever. Despite, what you know the only constant in life is change. Without this strength and risk taking of getting hurt again you will not be able to find the true love of your life. So it is all about time, and in this time you got to love your self & stop criticize it totally. You should believe you both deserve happiness, and you wouldn't want to spend your life with someone who doesn't love you as you do. Don't block your pain, but let your self feel it with all the memories, cuz blocking it will keep it their for along time. Keep a diary of all the process you are going on. Write in it how you feel every day. First, make a list of what will you do for someone you love that is heart broken for example, I will buy them the thing they always wished to have. I will take them to a party with all the friends they enjoy time with. I will write a love tender letter to them. What ever comes into your mind, and do that exactly for your self. Express what ever you feel every day into your diary. This will help you get out of your emotions. Don't rush into a new relationship just to forget the other one. Be sure you really want it and you are almost healed up. Remember no one can heal you except your self. It will be good to write also what you learned from your breakup, all negative thoughts turns them to positive. For example, you thought you learned never to believe someone promise cuz they may break it easily. Re-arrange it, I learned to be more careful in whom I trust, how, I will give it more time and I will be more concerned with actions than words, I will trust again & will be able to forgive when it is broken again. In the end all figures are not the same. I love the song called " the next time I fall in love " . It describe the lesson learned from breakup. In conclusion, Believe that you are able to go over this emotional set back, you can also read books on how to heal or read articles in the internet. You will find a lot of stuff. At the end, know that without any risk in this life you won't get what you want. Keep believing there is a true fulfilling love that will last forever and that you are willing to let it enter your heart again some day.

Dare you to Move

Its weird how poeple have something inside them where they want to do so bad but they postpont it for another day. I dare you to move and live the moment and risk and think its your last day and like today will never happened or will ever happen or has never happened before!
Just do it and go for it! Just an advice to my dear blog!

The entertainment team!

Having an amazing event here at work in december...
Have to work hard on making it a success :)


Good luck dija ;)

What i read in the newspaper today..

One of my favorite topics is astronomy and as always i go seek in newspapers anything related to our galaxy.. So today i read in Al-Watan that at the 17th of Oct at exactly 02:30 A.M the moon will be next Saturn in tuesday that night which is practicly tomorrow.. It will be clear in Oman's sky till dawn comes..
Cant wait to spend my night in the roof ;)

Last night while driving back from work at 1:30 AM i relized that i have no fuel! But beat it i drove till home risking that my car will stop! lol but i will never stop no matter what cuz i hate stoping for filling my car! So daddy am sorry you have to fill my car till i die :S heheheh

Honey its just an axcuse for him not to feel guilty!

Well well well what can i say about the world of men.. They're just trying so hard and so much to act and BE smart but the fact is US girls are much smarter in some way! I mean come on guys admit it girls are much wiser then guys most of the time! In most cases a 13 years old girl is much mature then a guy in her same age! We think we use our brains! Only in one case a girl might get stupid and silly and that case would be when she follow her heart and fall in love!!!
One of my (stupid case) friend fell in love with this guy and she made a fool of her self to be frank as i told her lol.. so the story in short words she fell for him he has an old girl that he cant STOP taalking too, she found out and dumbed him! Stupid check was thinking oh there's hope he will get back to me in the end! The dude was trying his best to be so charm and stuff but no use she's still waiting! you know to make him pay back the pain! NOW after waiting for 4 months or more he came out of no where all though he know its nottrue and he accused her to leave him for a guy! And after giving up his lame SILLY EXCUSE he went back to his girl and he changed his NUMBER HAHAHAHAHA how silly and lame and STUPID is that! And as i told my preciouse friend; Honey its just an escuse for him not to feel guilty! Selvish eh.. Tpical man!

again we reach this time of the year where we all have a month of peace and speritial balance between everything... Ramdhan Kareem to all

And i'm finally legal !!!! :D

yeah on the 3ed i've reached my finall stage in "the being old life"! lol ..
The sentense that really cracked me at mid night that night when one of my work co screamed YOU'RE FINALLY LEGAL loool i laughed big time and everyone started singing for me there and for the first time ME moi the devilished girl got shy and all red at that moment lol! Phone calls and sms's were coming like crazy to my cell and i was just confused about everything! I HATED my self at that exact moment lol a person should be happy but i was all nervese and sweating! :S i hate such embarresing moments but it was so good and i loved it :)
It was like the national day or something , i felt so popular. Felt good but something was missing :)

i had a blast...

The Expected Tradagical End..

Day one came and i reached a cloude
day two reached and i opened the sky with my hands
i flew across roads, rivers i saw through my path with you
one night with my throughts and i and you appeared again
what is going on in my life, what is my heart beating for
a long a spirital night i had that day
a lonely moment with my soul and his i hold so tight
had so many evenings hugging him and just playing with his eyes
had so many occasions where we were one and one is us
felt him going so deep in to me, shared a life time knowing him so close
day thousand came and i'm still happy but where are we reaching
i spred my wings and i just flyi dont know where am i heading
i just fly and i have no fear at allthe saftly part is still here
the warmth that i feel is just to much to with i deal
its too much to be free nor real
than a year two came, a life time for my soul
and right over there everything stopped
and the expected tradagical end came....

Love...

Love is just a word a game a toy in someones hand. the funny part is that you love someone so bad so hard till you cant breathe and at first you didnt even know that person does exist. You were totally cool without him and you were so free and cheerful and having a peacful life without him. Than out of a sudden he's here and you're so happy you're flying from happiness first month the second one than what a whole life like this. Not a big deal you'll wait cuz you love and you wait and wait and you lose cuz of that one particular person. And then you reach a level where you dont know who you are any more you're just lost in a world of doubts and you lost every thing around you even your own self just waiting for that ONE simple thing and in the end NOTHING! you give everyhting and you sacrifise ALL and in the end you get played and he will preffere someone else who will make you think do i have something wrong in me! and the answer is ITS NOT ME its him. I'm perfect i am every guy's dream i have it all but why cant this ONLY one person see this. i dont need the whole world to see it i want you to see it. After this you go through the same cyrcle every day and you'll end up lonely crying the whole night thinking do i deserve this am i that stupid to keep waiting for some kind of a dream. Love is a fairy tale there's no such thing now days. its 1 out of 5 who will stay faithful to the other partner. Love is a word in the wind you can see it but you can feel it but it will never last cuz it has to fly away some where else.

An e-mail from America

Well got an e mail from my favorite uncle that i love and havent seen forever... it made my day :)

Addicted to Lost!

A friend of mine at work have being buggine me about this Tv show called "Lost" i was just like what the hell is wrong with him and he always come with eeh lost is the best LOST lost lost lost!
i got fed up so i tend to ignore him most of the time! :S lol
then i came and saw Opra the other day and interviewed this cute HOT dude about him staring in the LOST show i was cracking up when i saw the name of the show cuz i remembered my friend from work! And than i decided to ask him for the DVDs to watch them. Than the whole addiction started! ITS SO COOOL i loved it and the story and actores the whole package of the series its amazing!
My favorites are Sawyer with his weird character and Jack with his so concerning carring responsible personality! Damn i love these two :D

The wedding!

Its mum again dragging me to one of her weddings! Went there and doooo that was one hell of a wedding! I went lesbo last night man! Chicks where so HOT i mean lol no i'm not a lesbo or anything not even bio but DUDE! every one was dressed up and looking so cool with their cute flufy alphets. kinda weird but loved it! lol The groom was the brother of a minister and the family are fealthy rich. The funy part that the family brought their servents from their home twon! Stupidity i was sitting with a wide open mouth looking at how these poeple accept this treatment from any one. Well curiousity killed the cat, i went there and asked one of the women who serves (they were wearing the same traditional clothes all of them) i was like mmm why do you let them treat you like this. The crazy chick started to yell at me that its the way it is since ages i was like well you dont need this and you're not forced to do it any more.. The lady started yelling and calling poeple and saying come see this crazy girl what is she saying. My mum's friend which is the grooms sister looked at me with this weird what the hell are you doing look. She called my mum so i was like SHIT now this is serious! The lady started telling my mum tell your girl not to get in to poeple's business!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My mum looked at me with that what the hell is wrong with you look and i just like WELL MUM and i heard her shushing me only! lol we went out of the wedding cuz mum got embaressed of my deeds! :S what a wedding!

Making a decision!

I used to have a problem in making the right decision. But finally i'm over that! How and why?
Well i can answer the why part but not the the how part! Well how cuz being hanging with two decision is difficult and it leads you insane comparing the two which in the end you end up in a same cyrcle. Its a weekness thing i can say. To be stuck in your decisions not knowing what you want. Choosing between two things is totally hard but i believe that you can always follow what balances your heart and mind! And in the end you'll reach the right thing! Thus in some cases you might choose the wrong decision but the consecuences of that decision will never make you regret what you choose! Its just pathetic now after i look at it when i used to confuse my self about everything! Just make it snappy and be strong and choose what you want and what you feel is right even if the wholw world see it wrong!
;)

ITS FRIDAY!

damn i hate this day its so slow and the time is just not running at all! The crapiest day of the weekend! i'm working on this day so its gives me that depressing feeling that i'v never felt in my life eeeeeeeeeeeeeekhhh!

A so sleepy day! I feel sleepy that i fell a sleep while talking to a customer :S i was trying to invent a lie to my boss all day but nothing seems to wrok :(

I HATE THIS DAY!

Blind

I was young but I wasn't naive -
I watched helpless as you turned around to leave -
and still I have the pain I have to carry-
a past so deep that even you could not bury if you tried -
after all this time -
I never thought we'd be here -
when my love for you was blind -
but I couldn't make you see it -
that I loved you more than you'll ever know -
and part of me died when I let you go -
I would fall asleep -
only in hopes of dreaming -
that everything would be like it was before -
but nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting -
they disappear as reality is crashing to the floor -
after all this time -
I never thought we'd be here -
never thought we'd be here -
when my love for you was blind -
but I couldn't make you see it -
after all this why -
would you ever wanna leave it -
maybe you could not believe it -
that my love for you was blind -
but I couldn't make you see it -
couldn't make you see it -
that I loved you more than you will ever know -
and part of me died when I let you go -

A world of insanity...

Its weird how you have many experiencs in life trhough your whole life in everything. Like its known older people are more wiser cuz of their experiences in life, yet thats not what i believe since old poeple now adays as i can see are just acting in simple words (childish). Over 20 years old and still gossiping and still going through stupid love affairs! I mean how can age tell you that person is wise or not! Even a 10 year old can be wiser then a 20 year old depending on how do you look in to life and how do you deal with things. Experiences can always be a good lesson for you to change the way you look in to things and the way you make decisions. How can an adult like 25 years old say that i cant live wihtout someone in my life calling in the middle of the night to sweet talk to me! What kind of immaturity is that! Life is much bigger that physical feelings and silly stuff. Life is a way to reach for a bigger thing. Its a short period where we live with a high esteame manners! Where i think the person should concentrate on being more cheerful and seriouse in the same time! And having a balance in all things in a person's life gives him the spirit to face and survice in everything and most of all he/she would definitly gain the respect from poepel and gaing a respect to his own soul. Its just so sad how i see our generation these days not devloping their selves and just wasting their time and life in things that are not useful at all not to them or to the human race! How can i rate the wisdom and the maturity of each person! By their deeds and of course by their thoughts which reflect them in the end and give us all as a one global family the peace we need..

Cheers to the world of insanity..

Guess who's back! [some snap shots from my life]

Ok it me back again to my stinky humble Blog! hehe! well during my leave from work from school from the net from every thing! Just had some sweet calm holiday with me and my books and my life! Was studying for my exams "thank god they went well" during that time in home i was just taking some photos by my mobile and thought to post them here! Some are dumb but hilarious! lol; Woke up the first day in my holiday and was freaking hungy!
No one is home all at work and schools and this is what i found
i wanted to cry at first i was like noooooooo i NEED FOOD not rubish!
However i ate it and i was happy and satisfied.. Thank you god for this
bless :)

Mum went to Matrah ( a place in Muscat) To get some

Cheap stuff she wanted. Went with her and i was smei dead wanted

to sleep so took this pic on the road to cheer my self up!

Went to college to meet Mr Damo (Dams like i call him)

For some question i wanted to ask! Took this photo

and send it to my cousin for a laugh! Damn this guy is tall! :/

I saw it in a magazine and took it for fun!
My baby (my car) Isnt she a beauty! :angel:

Aaaaaah i'm in love!

Went to work for a visit the next day! ppl at work

were going crazy cuz of some issue! This was the

que board and the ppl on waiting as it shows reached to

65 call! Damn that was a busy day for my poor colleague!

Went back home saw my kid bro running half naked

in the house i was like Whhhh lol he always do it

so took this one while he was making some actions

Acting like spider man he's favorite charectar!

Went to my aunt's place like we always do every

Thursday and saw this from my car's window and took it!

The magazine pic again!
My lovely Cat :May3ah" man i love my baby may3ah!
Was driving the other day and took this pic!
I woke up in this day and the weather was woow

Went to our living room and took this shot!

It shows out garden :)

My baby ( my car) Again! :angel: :)
My baby boy ( cousin) he's name is Mundhir!

He's so noisy but i love him to death! He was surprised

When i took this one! :P

went to work for some papers and one of my colleauge took this

pic of my shoe! lol he send it to me latter! Awain he likes the shoe!

Away!

Well well well i have my exams coming and i'm just exhorsted from work and this silly job is just leading me to go crazy! Yeah the superviser position is killing every one here and they need about 4 ones where i work and every one is taking that chance to prove him/her self as a leader!
Excuse me colleagues its OMAN it only works with WASTA! so what the hell i'm away from here for two weeks! BYE creapy company will meet up after 14 days exactly :D
Well its really sad that i and some over here are working so hard and working thier buttes in many things round here and all what they get is Sh!it ... Yes i'm so angry and just feeeling like killing someone at the moment! Its not just about work even my silly love life is going trhough hell now! Ehhh random words are just coming out of my heart to my hands to be written in this place! nothing is fair you go right you get wrong you do wrong you get right! :S:S:S:S:S:
this world in this country in this company in this office i'm just feeling like to scream!
I love i'm being betraid i work hard i'm being ignored! What can i do more than this!
Screw everything i'm away!

The Bold And the Beautiful <<<< Link!

My favorite TV show that i used to watch since i was in the third grade lol! Yesterday was episode 4608 and its the sloweset soap that i ever saw but mmm not slower than days of our lives lol. Well this soap is just one of the amazing tv serieses that i ever saw! The Forrestet family and the generation after it living to see the kids of Ridge, Taylor, Brooke and the great Eric Forrester. I'v being addicted to my show since alittle gal. My mum was a big fan too since it attrack such women and young girls,not any more though. But the amazing part about this tv seriese is that each time the writters just come with new things whcih make it more interesteing and the actores in it are just growing in the screen with the audience! US lol!
Its story is just so close to poeple who are watching it and the things happeneing in it make us live and believe in whats going in the forrester family... Yaaaay what a great show but i'm a bit mad about Ridge since he chose Taylor instead of brooke! I mean yes Brooke is a bit tough but her personality is just that strong lady who always go after what she wants! That Logan lady is just wow! When it comes to Dr; Taylor she's ok for a personality who's calm and just peacful! But she's kinda mmm i dont know so easy to be fooled! :S Cant wait for episode 5000 to come lol :P

An Old friendship!, bringing old memries (Part I)

:) well well well what can i say about some really old friends that i have and can willl have forever in sha2 allah.. 4 gals that being there for me and for eachother for the past 9 years from my life! Sam, Ju, Duda, Nusy...
well how did we met a funny story actually. lol i was sitting in this school table the first of our 7th grade class. And i was just having this arrogent face lol and there was this girl that our teacher has chose so she can be in charge of the class while she's gone for some school work! So comes this girl to me and says; hey can you sit in the chear since its not allowed to sit in the table! I just gave her that face and just totally ignored her! lol that was childish i know! heheh but that she just walked away from me and started talking to her other frineds (ju, Nusy) and i just totally acted like miss Whatevvvee lol! than it started by hate and latter on by days passing ju started to be close to me since i used to make her laugh the whole time! and that i started to hang around those 3 gals thus sam was a bit cold with me since that insident that happened between us! latter on we were just being good friends and having reall fun and we laughed a lot.. And actually i was miss Samyah's favorite Puppy lol! She's our "Ejtema3eyat's Teacher" and i was just being her favorite student and i used to call her miss bamyah lol! and sam was miss Iman's favorite gal well she was the brightest in 3loom" Sience. And than one day come where we were suppose to have some kind of lesson but than out miss was absent and we had this miss Shiekha as our seatter replacment! LOL she was really obnoxiouse and was really that type that get angry in a heart beat! So the first thing she said after slamming that door so hard! I dont want to hear any noise ir you're all going to be punished! So all of us were just sooooo quite! lol the hilarious part comes next! Sam has brought her walkman! lol and ju was listening to BARBY GIRL under her white school scarf! and i was just sitting in the front side of the class and i got this note from the girl back my side! the note said; Hey come sit with us! So i knew it was my new cool freinds. so i went to them after asking permetion from that angry looking miss shiekha! so she said fine lucky me! So i came and the class was just like in dead silence and poor ju was just in another world with her barby song lol! So i was walking with a smile on my face and i was walking like marra with no sound! lol so i wouldnt disturbe that angry looking miss! so i was just reaching the chears where ju, sam and nusy where sitting and than out of a suddent ju look up and saw me so with LOUD SHARP NOISY voise she said HIIIIIIIIIII DIJJJJJJAAAAAA and every one was just like HUH! and i had this terified look up my face and sam turned RED and the girl is still surprised what happened here! and the miss stood up looking directly at ju with her funny smily face and i was just feeling like ooooh my god, sam was pulling the headset from ju's ears and every one is just STARRING at her and the class just blew up in laughter and the girl is still shocked and surprised about what happened! And at that moment i just turned my eyes in to that angry miss who was screaming and yelling BLA BLAAA BLAAAA and ju was punnished to stay up standing the whole lesson LOOOL! me, sam and nusy where just CRYING from laughter and ju is still asking whats going on WHATS GOING ON lol and i just couldnt help it on laughing tham miss Shiekha yelled ENOUGH lol so i just couldnt so we all end up standing with JU LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!

Wow what great memories! will come with more some other time! yeah the part where we met Duda was hilarious like never! :P

The reason

i'm sorry that i harmed you

i'm sorry that i killed you

i'm sorry that i found you

i'm sorry that i catched a tear

i'm sorry that i felt you

i'm sorry that i loved you or even smelled you

forgive me for each moment i breathed you

spare me from the guilt of living withing you

kill me for not keeping my heart where are you

slag me for holding your hands between my fingures

i'm not a different person from who am i suppose to be

to change i was the one that used to be

for faith i held my whisperes to thee
for you i said that i have to go
for you i found a reason to start over new
for only he whcih i meant you
can i take it all away and be the reason for you to hear
i never meant to hold you near and close everything for free
to be with you i had to make a wish to come true
i'm not perfect to do things that i wasnt suppose to do
its something that i'm living with every day for so
a reason to reviele and to open up for me to feel
its only a reason to live again
its only a reason to love again
its only a reason for you

i loooove surprises but i hate them !

well mmm this kinda conflecting and weird but its ME! :/ LOL
i lovvve doing surprises to poeple and i just love to see them shocked about things i do :P
BUT if it comes to me poeple surprising me NAAAAAAAA i hate it! i just dont know its much better if they told me and oh well i'll act surprise about it if they want x) this sounds stupid but hey i wanna be preppared for any surprise being dedicated to me! i mean what if i was the star of a surprise party and i was filthy and not MUTKASHKHA like i was suppose to be on my party.. Thats just lame! well lol its nice but naaaaaaa i'd love to surprise ppl who loves surprise but not to surprise poeple who dont like MOI! xD
well mmmm i saw this colleague or more like a friend of mine at work who got this HUGE cute rapped gift from someone who was brought at work and she was sooo happy, shocked , sad, blushed and she was just like OH MY GOD.. well poor she every one was teasing her.. oooooooo from who from who why how when! and i was just like leave the poor gal alone! maskeena she was red like a tomatto lol! maskeeeeeeeeena!
NO SURPRISES for me please! x/ thats if any one thought of it lol!

Maryam Al Bakry

Gosh i know this will seem like a lesbo talking but the truth is something else X)
Well this girl that i used to work with a year ago is one hell of a woman to be honest. She's just the exact role modle of the girl i wanna be and wanted to be. Her way of living her way of thinking her success and her funny way of talking when its time. She just walks and every one is forced to respect her and she just cought every ones attention. the confidence in her personality is amazing and she's so down to earth all though every one just go wooooooo butterflyes each time she just passes by. Un fortunatly she joined the compnay the get some cash to travel abroad to complete her studies.. Well today i saw her back and i was just shocked when i saw her in front of me that i screamed OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD lol :P and i just went and hugged her (again no lesbo thingi involved) she's still that adorable girl that makes me feel wow this is a good day and i can make my way to my success road. Well she's still as pretty as last time i saw her as cool and fun and encouraging as last time i saw her lol x) and the best thing ever SHE GOT ENGAGED wooooooooooooow i was soo happy and i was sooo excited for her, And she was like doooont follow my leads now lol you're still pretty and young to get involved with men now! LOL i felt eeeeeeeeeeh BUTTERFLYES every where! x)
Bless you Maryam ;)
againg i'm not a lesbo just someone i really admire and respect :)
Cheers!

The pay check day x)

Well well well one of the best days in the employees life is the pay check day x)
At work poeple are waitting patiently for the day where they get thier cash. Just like in the jungle animals are waiting for the day where they can practise thier sexual activities x)
So the day they get thier cash... Malls, coffe shops, movies and resturants are full and packed with workers... All the plans are post ponted till the day they get the cash...
Haaaaaaa suhaila mattaa will buy the 3abbayah... MMMM when we get the cash la! x/
Huh shaimaaa when shall we go to the movies.. mmmm when we get the cash la.
Hey Najwani when are we going for the picnic... Abe! wehn we get the cash la x/
X/ X/ x/
DOKOM they finihs thier money is ONE day and be left with nothing till the last day of the month where they get the cash again... Why cant they save and be happy all days and mmmm spend as much as they can during the whole week. Not like spend it in no time! just like the animals in the jungle having needs in one certain sesson :S and zats it!
POEPLE SAVE MONEY GOD DAMN IT! lol

My Tech Day!

:s eeeeeeeeh What a busy day. The connection with omantel is down so we have to suffer those angry obnoxiouse un beliveable monster customers who call yelling at us :S
And yeah the Technical department is just having TODAY shortage in staff! And i have to suffer this freaking shortage! :S lol oh well its a b it challanging but yet its too risky since we're the final line in the help service x) so you know i have to find a solution to the customer's problem and face them if not :S
Well today i had this customer who was called;
Angry customer; You nawras ppl are $%^&#^*!&***
(poor) Me; HUH sir mmmm welcome to nawras!
Stupid Angry Customer; I dont want u to welcome me you you yoouuuu!!!!
Me; mmmm sir may i know whats wrong!???
Customer; YOU ARE THE PROBLEM!
Me (shocked); WTF meee! how can i be ur problem!
Customer; I dont want to speak to you get me a guy!
Me (being pushed from my buttons); WHAT! A GUY!
Customer ( abit tarefied from me); mmm well you know i spoke to a guy with the problem thats why!
Me (with my head up); well tell me the problem and i'm sure i can help you out!
Customer; Well i cant use my EDGE T-Modem on my PC!
Me; Well sir you know i need to check out some certain stuff like mmm ur bill like mm your connection dial up and mmmm you know the right installation!
Customer (bllowing up in my face); SEE THATS WHY I WANTED TO TALK TO THE GUY SINCE I'V CHECKED EVERY THING ALREADY AND I'V DONE EVERY THING I COULD!
Me (Mi7terqah) ; Well mmm in that case you can show up over here and i can check it out from my side!
Customer; Give me 5 minutes and i'm there!
Me (swaeting); WHAT! i mean yeah sure e7em one of the guys will help you out!
Customer; NO! you will help me! since you inssisted to help me from the begining!
Me; X) yeah sure!! $%*$*#*($(&*#*#
The security man show up after 7 minutes exactly! Who's Flanah Al Filani!
ME; e7em i rais my hand just like in school!
The security guy; customer is out waitting for you!
Me; mmmmm okkk let him in!
I go rush to this smart dude who work with us! HELP!
Smart guy; HUH!
Me; i just made a sighn with my hand >>>> there!
Smart Guy; okkk! well mmm yeah sure just give me a sec and i'll go!
Me; Went to the customer and i was just like :0
oh my god this dude IS SOOO TINY you hear him on the phone you'll be like what a TISON! ooh my god! I hold my laugh n just walked to the toilet cracking up! LOOOOL
What a day! :P

A chit chat with Braiks, Dangoo and Queen.

Last night i went on line to say hi to the dangoo gal that i'v known throgh the english sabla. Out of sudden comes Braikz on line so i'v added the dudes in the same conv adn it was a blast lol. Than the Dangoo chick added queen to the whole fuzz. LOL i was having a great time making fun of them hehehehe. Than started the stealing game, Dangoo stealing my smilies from my MSN the ones that i stole from nicobambi LOL. poor guy he was posting new cool smilies and dija the thief is just stealing and adding to her MSN. than i found out that i'm not the only smily thief in town. This chick is stealing and showing off X) what a gal. Than we had a huge fight about which car is better and i still think that my car is the best :cough: heheheheh :D
Than i found out that the braiki dude is a good dancer in the sharqi (massri) dance LOL. well thats was the joke of day in the conversation ;p heheh

Well guys you're the best ;) keep on intertain moi :P LOL
P.S; Nico you missed the conversation next time i shall add you there as well ;)

Khalfan, Muzna, Iman And Ra7ma

These 4 poeple at my work always get surprised when they see me the whole day on my desk writting.. Asked me muzna today WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING ON YOUR PC THE WHOLE TIME? lol i was like honey lemme send you this thing and you'll see what i'm doing. I'v send the cute little pink lady my blog URL and the chick was amazed and they started making comments every where here. Oh yeah you're gonna lose weight oooooh deej stop eating chocolate. LOL Deej me i was all embarressed and i decided to share the ppl over this place about these crazy 4 buddies at work. lol Khalfan is the smart discpline guy who always say WORK comes firsl lol. Muzna is the craziest among us she just loves to move and to be like SHE'S THE MAN! lol :P comes Iman she's so quite and she's all sweet to every one.. Maaaa 7eeelllooo her favorite word... 4th Ra7mah this girl is just hilarious she makes us laugh the whole time and when you need a shoulder to cry on she's always there. :)
lol we just eat in this place the whole time. Cookies, drinks, chocolates and crips and you ask me why i'm not losing weight LOL :p
Bless you guys! :)

My stupid Diet

Well since i feel i'm over weighted and sine i'm 170 cm tall about 5 and half feet, i need to be fit to feel satisfied about my self. Therefor i'm starving my self to have the proper weight i'm seeking for. The problem is that my body is getting use to this stupid diet and the surprise is!!!!!!!! I'M NOT FREAKING LOSING A THING :s lol well this worked when i was in high school and i'v lost about 12 KGs in one month only. Why isnt it working now? well the only thingi eat was chocolate and it was a charm of losing weight it gives you the energy you need instead of the food you eat for it. BUT NOW, nothing its not working any more. Well maybe cuz i used to swim alot, swimming every single day for hours and hours just like a fish lol. OH MY GOD i got it now i stopped swimming since i'm working 24/7 :"( too bad... But i promised my self to lose weigth and i will.
Period x)

Deej 05:43 PM at work at the moment (talking to a pathetic customer)!

The dream.

Well what can i say, at first i used to be a typical nowadays girl. Being distracted by the things which go with the flow. Evrey single day i'm going through problems and i'm feeling angry of the whole world and i'm just upset the whole time. Fights with my parents with my sisters and the whole family. Till that day i woke up.. Had a dream about me my dad and that we died. And i saw how sad my mum and sisters were. And i was crying for real in that dream. It was so painful that i wished if it was a dream in the dream it self. Through that pain and tears and my family is crushed by the loss of two. Comes the time where we were barried in the grown. It was so dark that i couldnt see my own hand. Its not a normal darkness at least at night i can see at leat a thing. And the obnoxcious voices that were there. It was so noisy and so crowded thus i cant feel a thing. Then comes two tall really tall things talking in a wierd language. In that second i found my self with my dad with these tall ppl and now i understand what they say. This time they were saying that i'll go to heaven and my dad to hell. I was so scared that i felt my body hair was stnding and it was so cold in the same time. The other one said the dad is going to hell since he's older and his good deeds and bad deeds are the same. And the girls is is going to heaven since she got more good deeds than bad ones, and her age is helping since comparing to her age the bad deeds are really high. But the good ones are tripled from the bad deeds. And i was puzzeled.. Mmmm i know daddy is a good man how come he's going to hell. Out of a sudden i woke up...
So since that morning i found the good person in my heart and soul :) and i thank God i did.

Jealousy in my blood..

Yesterday was a normal day for me. Woke up with a smile woow what a day that was the first thing came up my mind.. Recieved a call from baby so i was so pleased and was so happy that he did :blush: lol that can never work with me x). took a shower and btw i'm addicted to showers :S any ways took my make up and put all over my face lol, was so beautiful for work. So after lookig at my self in the mirror for about an hour so i was satisfied a bit. Well went to my car and i was so enjoying my music in the car and i was like mmmmm i'm hungry lemme stop and grab something from the select next to the airport.. So i went there with a smile grabbed a red bull and a twix. and i saw this cute HOT sext chich "no i'm not a lesbo" and i was like mmmm am i dreaming or this gal is trying to hide from me. well mmm i still couldnt see her face since each time i go any where in the store she go to the opposite side.. thoughts in my mind; strange, odd, WTF, how come why ?????? well so i was like mmmm going to know who you are you you you #$^$^$&^*&*&^$@$!$ then i was SHOCKED to know that she's my cousin who's younger than me for three years. The gal was suppose to be in school studying or whatever since its her last year thalith thanaweeeeeeee! :S so i pretended that i didnt see her and i was screaming in my heart HUH WHY HOW COME WHO WILL NO WHY than i saw this dude on his pursh cayane or whatever that car is and he was looking at her and they were talking on the phone and i was like EEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW ewww ewwwwwwwwww andi felt that jealousy part on my blood that i was about to explode so i was like calm down dija calm down non of your business NO IT IS MY BUSINESS I SHOULD GO AND YELL AND TELL HER TO GO TO SCHOOL again another voice started singing lalalalalalalaaaaaaaalaaaalaaa laaa laaalaaa Just ignore it.. So i tool my car went to work and here i'm today writting about my pathitic jealousy thingie and not doing anything about it :'(

The Craziness of Love

What is love
What does it stands for
A magic word
To feel, to heal or to with, you deal
A funny feeling in your heart
Where you smile for a moment
The next you tear till you feel the pain
The moment you show up
The moment you appear
My heart go crazy like a cute little deer
Jumping in the woods happy to find his path
Did I found mine?
A quick question appears up my crazy mind
What if what if
Many many crazy thoughts runes out there somewhere
Never had this feeling
Never felt this weak till shaking
Thinking about you is driving me crazy
Going crazy latterly, madly just feeling you inside me
I totally realized that you are the true love
The love that I was searching for
The second you come
The moment I see your face
I can breathe you while you pass
I can smell you while you hide
I can track you by your heart beats
Even if you hide from my sight
I can still find you by my soul
I close my eyes and search your heart
I found you
In the night hugging my pillow
Feeling you next to me
Holding me
Squeezing my self between your arms
Just like someone’s teddy bear
I don’t know whats going on
All what I know that I know that meaning
The meaning that every one is trying to define
What is it?
Love!
Yes I know what is it
Its something I cant explain
Its what makes me crazy and peaceful in the same time
I cant live without you, so don’t run away!


Some words which i felt to write :)

A little thing it starts
A 9 months time we stay there
froever till death come she's the reason
the reason to be here
from the time we cried for the first time
till the day we reached the moon for glory
as a crowlling child to my toy
till i grew up to make that toy
she was the one, the one behind the seence
the one who said no to the world while the world said yes
I am with my child
thats her favorite sentence
holding my hands when i was down
held my up again to learn
showed me the right path to led
through every single alphabet till the length of a square
you were there since day one
pushing me to do more and more
to show whats best on her little girl she wish
for me i was the super star of her life
just random words for her and thee
to let her know the love within
Happy mothers day my mum :)

Its just another friday!

The morning came, woke up feeling lazy. Not my day the first thing came up my mind! Took my phone to check any call! NOTHING! Felt even more upset. Dialed a number, no answer felt even more upset! Than recieved a message which made me go mad! Oh gee whats going on here its just going crazy so far! Had so many work to do, cousins project, sister's assiment, brother's poster and my own studies! Than came the best part of this day! Prayers. Felt a bit relifed and a bit relaxed from this messy day i'm having! Back to reality its works time! Get ready in a rush go to work! Worried was i all day! This person is making me more worried. Where is he!? He's lying on bed sick! I'm getting killed by this feeling inside! Here at work, angry customers stupid questions! And just to make it worse it started raining! Poeple dancing from happiness and i'm still this sad upset meaningless face! i dont know i just hate the rain.Than i just paused for seconds ............................. Oh now i know its just another friday!

A Life ends for a life to start!

Well well well was away from my dear place for a while arent i.. Oh well back again here :)
What can i say.. Ending a whole life is not an easy thing but starting a new one is almost the easiest thing you do, if you want to.. Thus ending the life might be so depressing.. But what we dont know that God is always there to offer us the best after that. And that the after end is always better then the good we had! The bless we are gaining from ending the first one is the thing we dont even feel till we go so deep in it and just relise what a reliefe it was from the previous life.. The comparing part is next.. But from my point of view .. Never compare .. Just feel and live .. For its better and for real :)

Ahhhhh welcome back dijava :P

Second Cup..

Each time i go to Qurm i gotta pass by my favortie coffee shop to get the best hot chocolate or the best lover latees i'v ever tasted in my life :P and the good thing about second cup that thier prices are logical not too expensive not too cheap! I mean i like the rest of coffee shops ova here but still second cup has its magic and charm on me! Cant wait till they open in City Center Muscat!and as far as i can see they have a good service and the drive through is the best thing they have including the other features ! God bless Second Cup :D

Back to school!

Well the school headache is back again :S You see each year we go further we studies and we wish to go bnck for the previouse year since its easier from what we're facing now.. Thus college days are amazing with the girls and all, but when it comes to face Mr Dams "Our Proffeser" :S eeeeeeh that guys is just TALL! and i mean it he's the tallest dude i ever saw! I'm 5 and a half feet and my hear reachs his albo! He's a great teacher though! But damn he's class is boring he keep on talking non stop for two freaking hours not even one minute break! :O The college is just great with some certain ppl which are my friends! But most of the ppl there act wierdly like they're in some higher level then all ppl! And the guys over there omg one thing to say which is no comment! They're just un believeable with thier actions and 'Mughazala" evrey day!
Oh well back to the torture again! :D but i'm sure i'd miss it once i'm done with it! :)

Higher college of Technology
Al Taqaneyah Al 3ulyah! :D

The colour of love...

:) Love, a dangerous game in my opinion. It was always away to start somehting beautiful with someone. Its a way to say i care, to say i'm there and like someone once told me its also away to say thank you. What is love to us? Some use love and some honor love and some hate it to the extreame.. I used to be one of the poeple who find it discusting. And i used to see it as a completely wrong issue or sometimes feel it like a disease that poeple get. The colours of love are different just like the rain drops.. It reflects the persons ideantity and it shows the image of you. It colours your soul if it was true.. Its just there but its a legond to nowadays ppl.. They use i love you in every thing just like a simple word not knowing its a magical thing that can change every thing to good if it was from the heart. If its the right love then its true.. If it was a love that will feed physical needs then its not the one i'm talking about in here. Its the love that will make you gliter in all places.. :) just wanted to share that with all who reads this site..
Cheers

Preparing for eid!?

OH MY GOD, ppl in this country are just amazing! LOL they take a whole month preparing for three days. Its just amazing i mean it took me one day to buy whatever i needed. But when ever i go to al khoudh, Seeb, CC, Qurm or any where its all crowded of ppl buying and buying and BUYING again. Will they ever stop LOL. I mean ok even if you had like 5 kids you'll take each one in an individual day to prepare thats a calculation of 5 days add to that forgettin or not finiding what you need thats a max of two weeks. but would it take a whole month and the day bofore eid?! And what are the things you'r buying. I can see from ppl i know exmple"my cousing" shame on them LOL, they buy stuff they dont need. Over needed as i always yell at them. :S A new dress for the first day and maybe sum matching shoes would be more then enough in my opinion but for other ppl i just dont know what they have in mind?? :S Any ways i dont think the fancy cloths and stuff would bring the happiness and joy for us in eid. Its the spirit of eid it self that brings the happines we are looking for :) Eid mubarak ppl in advance..

Its cold outside!

The weather these days has totally changed. From the killing heat to way cold that hits the deep to your body. Its not a huge different to ppl who got use to cold weather. But us!! we got used to the summer heat with a sunny warm day. But oh well we kinda need a change. But this weather is just making ppl sick al lthe time. Flue, fever and lots of un ending deseases. Its a wierd weather that hits deep in to the bones. I dont think it'll last for long though. but hopefully not otherwise i'll die in my bed freezing :S

People and Hajj!

Many ppl are in the place that every soul wishes to be. Bein ready mentaly and physicly for the big Hajj sesson is more like feeding the humen's soul. To be honest i feel i'm still not ready for such thing. But hopefully one day i would. People go to Hajj to get more closer to God and as we all know that its Fardh for all poeple when ever they can go. The place on this sesson is so crowded with all kind of nationalities. People from all over the world gather for one purpose and for one reason. How lucky can those ppl be by bein there. And how many ppl out there didnt go and cant feel this jealousy of wanting to be there. Many hearts cant feet the beauty of the seeson and all what i can say is i'm sorry that you werent lucky and that God didnt bless them with such feeling...

Me my work and I..

Well since i work in a call center i have to deal with all kind of people. Most of them wierd actually since i got proposed by customer zillion of times :S Believe it opr not customers are so uncivilized to call just for fun and to seek a good time for nothing. They call asking for some stupied reasons and then after trying your best to reach thier level of thinking they go all wild with thier imagination that IIIII ME! have another purpose then surving them as a customer. The funny thing when about 3 customers insisted that i tell them where i live so they can go and propuse to me!!!! :S :X@#$^^$&$&&*$@!$! I got pissed off and i started yelling like a crazy chick! What the hell is wrong with men here in Oman. They think its a game or maybe they think a working girl is a toy to play with. Why cant working girls get the respect they deserve. Or dealing with all kind of customers will let the respect they deserve less?! A wierd world to tell you the truth. Its not ok with thier beloved onces or sisters to be played with like un respectable girls but its ok with other girls! All what i can say its just a world of un civilized humen beings since about 90% of male callers are calling just to hear a girl talking! :S

Its raining out side..

It was a day full of a great spirit every where. Like drops from heaven, covering every area.. Well In Oman we all know its rare for us to see such weather. Therefor the happiness appears in every one whether old or young "just amazing". Its a wierd feeling cuz its a sad weather in my point of view like the sky is crying and the dark sky is angry of something.. Thus it brings happiness as well.. Any how it was a completely great day.. I mean for a change from the hot sunny day all the time lol! It was just a bless :) from God, My kid bro couldnt take his face out from the window since mum yelled at us not to go out so we wouldnt catch a cold.. I felt bad so in the end we sneeked out of the house and we took a rain shower lol it was amazing.. I just fourward my face to the sky and i just felt it.. I felt like flying it was just a touch from an angel.. LOl in the end i came back to reality and i remembered my mum and i was like OH MY GOD kid bro inside the house urgent! LOL it was too late she cought us and i took the blame since i was the one who took baby mans "my bro" out side and of course cuz i was the elder sister! :S LOL in the end we told dad about our lilo adventure the great part about pups he was laughing at us instead of punishing us! :D a great day for me!